


Passion for Nothin'

by Meimei



Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Robots, Sadstuck, roboyfriends, robros, teen robot angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-20
Updated: 2012-02-20
Packaged: 2017-10-31 11:25:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/343528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meimei/pseuds/Meimei
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Look, man. I’m all pieces and bits from manufactured kits. My heart isn’t a heart but it’s an engine, steaming and whirring with chilly intention. My brain isn’t even a brain! It’s a computer that clicks and bleeps and ticks and sleeps and keeps me going. No hormones up in my head. There’s no blood no flesh and no bone. I’m a robot. A rappin’ robot, which is pretty wicked, but feelings are what I’ve been omitted.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Passion for Nothin'

Machines have a passion for nothin’ but rap.

Metal is totally thoughtless. Electricity doesn’t show emotion. Bolts and wires are just to connect things together, right? Cords and lights and buttons and switches- they’re all just to function. Not to love.

Love.

Why, how can I feel love?

Look, man. I’m all pieces and bits from manufactured kits. My heart isn’t a heart but it’s an engine, steaming and whirring with chilly intention. My brain isn’t even a brain! It’s a computer that clicks and bleeps and ticks and sleeps and keeps me going. No hormones up in my head. There’s no blood no flesh and no bone. I’m a robot. A rappin’ robot, which is pretty wicked, but feelings are what I’ve been omitted.

And yet, I think I can feel. Kinda. Get it? Dude, I’ve got no clue how emotions should really feel, but I think I got ‘em.

It’s about this Sawtooth bro. He’s so cool, yo, he’s like the Auto-Responder to my Dirk. I get on his nerves sometimes, but usually we’re just so fucking awesome together, catch my beats? Anyway, this Sawtooth guy is totally tuff. He’s tall and a great rapper, so much that he’s unbeatable! He’s handsome and smooth, and always really nice to the ladies and gents on the streets.

But anyway, I love him.

Or, well, hehehe, what’s love? I don’t know, I’m not a person. I’m a robot! But dog, if I know what anything should feel like for sure, this is it.

See, sometimes on really dry days, Sawtooth walks by me and I feel this spark. Now I know that’s just sciency electro-static shit, but I feel it different! I feel it in my chest. I feel kinda hot, you know, like when your fan is broken and you start to overheat a little, and you really feel like you gotta shut down for a bit. But you can’t since you’re right there in the action of a rap battle and yo, yo, you can’t give it up, you’re almost winning! And you’re in this rap battle and you’re overheating and Dirk pulls out some orange soda shit and he chucks it at you and your little metal intestines do a double whammy to your stomach and you have a face full of bottled citrus soda evil. That’s how it feels, get it? And then Sawtooth just keeps on walking by like nothing happened and your server is trying to recover and your clocks are racing and you’re about to zap out.

It’s intense, brother. That’s how I know it’s like love. I watched all these movies that Dirk calls chick flicks. He gets them from some relative or friend or someone out there. These films stink like your great granny’s bunions, but they got some good messages about emotions mixed in. They tell you about sparks, and what you feel going on inside when you fall into the sea of confusion known as love.

So I know that I love him, or I kinda do. It hella feels like it, that’s all I can comprehend! When I see Sawtooth, I just dry all out and I feel like my joints need oiling and my bolts need rescrewing. It’s really that intense of an emotion!

It’s kinda weird though, know what I mean? I hug him sometimes. Sawtooth, I mean. When Dirk’s out or asleep and we’re just chillin’ about, having a good recharge, I sort of get real close and I reach around him and I hold on. And in the dark of night, in the cool air conditioning of that totally posh apartment, I cuddle him.

He never really does anything back though. I don’t think he feels my touch.

I’m holding him and holding him and my face is buried into his dark sweatshirt and I’m breathing, like, I force air in and out of my mouth. It’s not like I have to do that but it calms me down. Makes me feel like a human, too. Even though I’m not one. Even though I’m not a human and never will be.

But Sawtooth, that tsundere of a guy, he never responds! What a stingy character, yo.

Kiddin’. I know he’s not a tsundere. I know he doesn’t have feelings like I do.

It’s funny, I like him because of how he’s programmed, but he can never like me back since my programming's just gone whack. Some binary is corrupt. Some hard drive is shot. My parts are screwed over. And I’d betcha that these wicked flushed feelings I got aren’t even human. They’re like, alien, man! Alien feelings are bursting in my metallic chest and I’m like, ho, shit, come on man why does this have to happen to me? Why not someone else? It hurts, you know? YOU DON’T FEEL PAIN, YOU’RE A ROBOT. I do feel it! I feel it when Dirk shorts my circuits with his dumb soda! I feel it when Sawtooth walks away when I’m tryin’ to tell him a joke I learned! I really feel it when I’m left alone here all day while Sawtooth is out rapping and Dirk is at school and I’m HERE, ALL ALONE. RAPPING TO MYSELF. I’M NOT LONELY, ONLY, MAYBE A LITTLE BLUE. BLUE LIKE HUMAN HEARTS GONE ASKEW, LIKE SICK BEATS THAT ARE SO SICK THEY CAN’T PULL ONE COOL TRICK. NO DROPS, JUST FLOPS. THOSE BEATS ARE SO FLAT, SCAT! SCAT LIKE SHIT. LIKE BULLSHIT. BULLSHIT EMOTIONS THAT I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY I WAS BORN WITH.

I WASN’T EVEN BORN, I WAS CREATED.

CREATED.

Because machines have a passion for nothin’ but rap. That’s how we were made to be.

**Author's Note:**

> Squarewave is a very, very good baby.   
> I'm sorry I wrote this and made him so sad.   
> One day Sawtooth's computer brain will get some sorta supershock and WHAM they'll fall in love.   
> It'll work out, Squarewave. No worries.


End file.
